Pinadequate Halloween Village

So, this one was actually a success, if I do say so myself.  I found this little project on Pinterest.  It was cheap and easy, so even a craft failure like me could handle it. 

Their village

And Mine

Did you know the Dollar Tree sells Christmas Villages? Well, they do, and you should buy one ASAP, because it's enough to do 2 different projects.  

See what I mean?  That's a lot of pieces.

I split it in half and chose the pieces I thought would look the creepiest painted black.  I'm saving the other half for Christmas.

I used some kind of black car spray paint that I got from Ollie's, but I'm sure you can use any kind.

The link above is right about the figurine faces.  They're dollar store quality, which means they're super scary looking already, so I covered them with my kids' Play Doh (shhh!), and spray painted around the faces.

First coat of paint. Nice and shiny.

Got the brilliant idea to cover that with Glow in the Dark spray paint, which dulled the finish and honestly didn't add the cool effect I was hoping for.  I would probably skip this part in the future.

Since I didn't have glitter paint, I again raided my kids' stuff and found their glitter glue.  The link says to highlight with the glitter paint, but why would you only highlight with sparkles, when you can make the whole thing shine? I had a bunch of different colors, and I think they turned out pretty.

Check out the spooky faces on the figures. 

Here's the full mantle, 90% supplied by the Dollar Tree.  The village is on the left, and the tombstones I also got from there are on the right.

Here's the village lit up, but it was still daylight, so it doesn't look very cool.  I also determined I need more lights, because even at night, you can't see very much.  

I was playing around in my closet with one of the black lights and 2 of the houses, and after seeing awesome glowing purple sparkles, I have determined that I need a string of black lights for the mantle.

So, overall a Winterest for me.  The fail came in when I decided to spray paint inside the house.  I used a plastic table cloth and was super careful not to get paint anywhere on the carpet, walls, etc. Where I was stupid was when I elected not to open windows or doors, so the fumes were apparently overwhelming when the fam came home.  I got a nice lecture from the spouse regarding toxic fumes blah blah blah.  He is an authority on the subject, as I was reminded, since he is an Environmental Health Manager for a University.

Ok, stupid, but here's why I spray painted inside. Have you guys seen The Vampire Diaries?  I know I'm late to the party on this one, but I am a Buffy loyalist, and I felt that this was probably a high school bullshit vampire drama that could only pale in comparison, but after I finished watching the whole Buffy series on Netflix (again!), I needed something else to watch. On my sister's recommendation, I gave it a shot, and now I'm hooked.  Anywho, I thought I could do my artsy fartsy stuff while getting my Damon on, which was apparently not the best decision.  I did finish the first season, though, so a productive day all in all.

Better Day

I was in a raunchy mood yesterday, I guess, because I feel much better today.  I went out for a wog, and I did the best I have all week.  I still wasn't able to jog the full 1.5 minute intervals, but I at least attempted each one and finished most of them.  My overall time was faster, and my distance was a bit farther.

I looked ahead, and week 3 is a routine of jog 1.5 minutes, walk 1.5 minutes, jog 3 minutes, and walk 3 minutes.  You do that twice along with a 5 minute warm up and cool down.  I'm not sure about those 3 minute jogs, but I think I'll try wogging around a track (flat) as opposed to my hilly 'hood.

Part of the reason for my improved mood is that I've hit a milestone of sorts with my weight loss.  I'm finally out of the 220's and back in the 2 teens.  I was stuck at the same weight for about 3 weeks, so I decided to cut carbs at night.  I'm staunchly opposed to depriving myself of any food group, because I've tried failed at deprivation diets far too many times, but my body always responds positively to limiting carbs.  I started doing it a few days ago, and the weight immediately dropped.  I've been steady for a few days, so I feel like it's not water fluctuation at this point, and I can tout my achievement.

I've been eating stuff like this for dinner:

See how super cheesy it is???  Delicious.  It's thin-sliced zucchini topped with marinara, shredded mozzarella, and pepperoni.  I got this idea on Pinterest natch, but they used low fat cheese and turkey pepperoni.  Maybe next time...

Oh, and I've learned that the best songs to listen to while working out are the most ridiculous ones you can find.  Think super cheesy ("Call Me Maybe") or this little gem that I had forgotten about and recently rediscovered:

This is the song with the lyrics, which I highly suggest you read if you need a good laugh. R Kelly is a real Poet Laureate fo' sho yo!

Even better- Young the Giant remixxed the remix.  Enjoy.

C25K Week 1 Day 3 and a Pinadequacy

I did it, bitches!  I made it through week one.  And not even half-assedly.  I mean I jogged ever time that bitch told me to and didn't stop until she seductively whispered "walk" into my ear.  I'm extra proud today, because not even halfway through, I got a cramp, and oh God, did it hurt.  The thing I noticed, though, is that I had more relief when I was jogging than when I was walking.  I tried the deep breathing lamaze shit, and that was a bust.  Basically I just had to slow down, and it eventually went away.  Every other time I've gotten a cramp, I've just flat out quit jogging and dragged my sorry ass home.  Not today, though.  I really think this program speaks to my inner submissive, because I truly just do whatever she tells me, no questions asked.  Even when one part of my brain says "I'm a grown ass woman, and I do what I want," as soon as she says "jog", it's knees to chest like a reflex.  Ok, maybe not knees to chest, but it's a jog of some sort.

I also was punishing myself a bit today, because I had next to no water yesterday, and then I had Hibachi vegetables (not so bad) with fried rice (bad), and about a gallon of shrimp sauce/aka yum yum sauce/this shit.  And to top it off, I finished the day with one of these.  Yes, I ate the whole thing.  It was over 600 calories, and it was delicious.  I'm back on it today, having a boiled egg and cherries for breakfast and steadily sipping water to replenish the waterfalls that dripped from my face and into my eyeballs. This brings me to my Pinadequacy.  Yesterday I did the bake eggs in the oven instead of boiling them thing, and it was fantabulous.  Basically you put the eggs in a muffin tin and bake them at 325 for 25-30 minutes.  I did mine for 30 minutes, because I don't care if the yolk is yellow or gray.  It tastes the same to me.  I can report that they are easier to peel, which is a good thing, because I can't tell you how many times I've lost half my egg due to it being stuck to the shell.

I have no idea who took this pic, because the blog is gone now, but it isn't mine, so suck it Copyright laws.

I also saw this on Pinterest this morning. 

Yeah, but it sure does burn the shit out of your eyeballs, impeding your vision, and possibly causing you to stumble in front of oncoming traffic.  I'm just sayin'.

Weekly Pinadequacy

On my other blog, I've already shown some of my ideas that I've stolen from Pinterest, and since I love it so much, I figured I'll start doing weekly posts with things I've tried and the disastrous results that ensue.  This is mostly for my sister's benefit, since she's basically the only one that reads this.

The reason I'm calling it a "Pinadequacy" is because I suck at all things creative, yet I still insist on trying.  I have done one thing that I'm pretty proud of, and it wasn't even Pinterest-inspired. When we were redoing my 3-year-old's room, I was trying to decide on artwork for her walls.  I came across a picture of a toddler's room in which the parents had hired a professional photographer to take pictures of the little girl's favorite toys, and they were hung in black frames around the room.  Well, I thought it was ridiculous to pay a pro to take pictures of some ratty old stuffed animals, but I loved the idea of the artwork being so personal, so I threw a white sheet over some chairs, borrowed my middle child's flexible lamp for lighting, and got in touch with my inner Annie Leibovitz.  I also repainted her dresser, which was mint green with pastel knobs, to a bright white with what can only be described as Reese's Pieces-colored knobs.

Everything else I've done is usually sub-par.  My edible creations are famous for being tasty, yet butt ugly.  I do love to cook, though, so a lot of my attempts at creativity tend to be food- related.  This week is no exception.

On Fridays I usually like to make something fun and easy for the kids, which they will inevitably turn their noses up at and end up eating Pop Tarts instead.  I tried to stay one step ahead today by cooking Brinner (breakfast for dinner, for you non-foodies), but with a Pinterest spin.  I ended up making these, which had about 80 calories a piece before the toppings (bacon, sausage, and chocolate chips), so really not bad, if you limit yourself to a few.

This is what mine looked like:

Ugly, right?  But so damned delicious.  I need to employ Photoshop or something I guess, because my food always looks so nasty when photographed.  Anyway, the rugrats ate them pretty well, so in my mind it was a success.  Below is the recipe I used:

3 Cups Bisquick Pancake Mix

2 Cups 2% Milk

1.5 Cups Sugar Free Syrup

Toppings (Bacon, Sausage, Chocolate Chips, Fruit, etc)

Mix the pancake mix, milk, and syrup and spoon into greased muffin tins.  Top with whatever you choose.  I cooked the bacon and browned the sausage ahead of time.  Bake mix with toppings in oven at 350 degrees for 12-14 minutes.  This makes 24 full-sized muffins, because I wanted to have enough left over for breakfast tomorrow.  

The next thing I tried was this.  Except, not really, because I love my International Delights Sugar Free Vanilla sooo much that I didn't bother with skim milk and vanilla extract.  I just blended my frozen coffee, the creamer, and a teaspoon of Splenda.  It's exactly what I drink every morning, because my morning coffee is literally a third creamer and two thirds coffee, so it tastes like a damned dessert anyway.  I just decided to freeze it tonight.  Oh, and I topped it with Sugar- Free Reddi Wip, which only has 5 calories for 2 Tablespoons.  My entire coffee dessert was less than 200 calories, so suck it Starbucks.  Here's a little tip in case you try it- freeze your coffee in little ice cubes.  I froze it in a plastic container, and it didn't freeze evenly.  Some was still liquid, and some was a chunk of ice that my blender just couldn't crush.  It is a shitty blender, though, but still.  I will try the cubes next time.